I dunno, but seriously with all the douche bags on Iowa State's campus recently--it feels less like a university and more like a set for a Summers Eve commerical. It's messed up.
Here's the top 5 things I've been witness to as of late...it's like the reality television show "True Stories of the State Patrol" but replace State Patrol with some girl named alie.
1. Some big "Johnny Football Hero" star guy in one of my lectures comes in late (per the norm) and he has a plastic grocery bag tied around his leg. Being that the guy is pretty "thugged out" usually, I just think it's some new ghetto style...I dunno representing Hy-Vee or some shit. Anyway, as the class progresses he falls asleep and wakes up very startled. As he is sitting next to me I look over and he mumbles "fuck, I forgot" and starts untying his grocery bag. Suddenly he gets a panicked look on his face and says, I can't feel my foot...seriously I can't feel anything. He then explains how he hurt his leg in practice and instead of taking pain killers he decided to tie off the circulation to numb the pain with a grocery bag.
2. Dumb bitch breaking up with her boyfriend on the Cyride bus...there's a time and place for that shit...not over the phone on a bus that's full of people being quiet and pretending to read the Daily.
3. The 30 year olds that play hacky sack in front of the library while listening to old school early 1990's grunge music...you guys are the coolest! Just fuck'n rad, seriously.
4. People who Text message while walking slowly to class with 200 yards of people backed up behind them on a busy sidewalk. Thanks moron.
5. Foreigner guy/chick who talks loudly on his/her phone in his/her native tongue while sitting in the study cubicles in the library...don't worry guys-I'm not studying anyway...I'm just there to read the graffiti some loser drew on the cubicle walls...creative drawings of stuff like penises, vaginas, and then great quotes like "I want to get her up the ass" or that "(insert rival fraternity here) sucks."
If this keeps up, I'll be replacing my morning coffee with a bowl of weed and a glass of malt liquor.
If you guess what song/band the title for this note was inspired by, I'll dry hump your leg* limit one leg dry humping per participant* no purchase necessary to play, state laws may prohibit leg dry humping--check local laws before participating.
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Erm, that song would be by LIT - I'm Not Sick But I'm Not Well.
No dry-humping necessary, though. :)
(I've never met you, but I know Andrea.)
Hi Alie
I've never commented before, as I never knew you existed, but you seem really down in your previous blog.
I'm sure things will get better.
Perhaps try and shower? I'm sure you'll feel better if you do.
And nice to see you have the same type of idiots and morons over there as we do here Fortunately when I went to Uni there were no mobiles in common use(- damn that ages me right there)but the same graffiti, which I read and occasionally added to while alledgedly studying!
-and I remember the song, now SisM said the title, so I guess I don't get the prize *sigh*
xx
ergoproxy, you just saying "perhaps try and shower" made me in a better mood. I laughed and woke up my dogs.
Actually the title is in a Harvey Danger song.
Also, my friend James wrote this on the same post but on a different blog.
"Anyway, point of your post. It's not just ISU... I experience the same things at UNI, excepting that our poor excuse for public transportation is just that -- a lame attempt at a Cyride wannabe that forces me to drive my car and get multiple tickets weekly.
I'd add this as well -
6. Drunk frat-boy looking guy attempting to do his laundry whilst really trashed. He keeps tripping around the laundromat and just making a f-ing mess. After he gets his laundry started (how... Katie and I will never know) he leaves. Hoping to be rid of him, we relax back to our computer and book. 10 minutes later, he comes back with some 40 year old who probably dumped her kids off at the babysitter to head to the hill to try and score, and proceeds to throw her up on the washing machines and get busy clumsily trying to engage in public sex."
It reminded me of your comment since you mentioned uni.
P.s. Hawkeyes suck. :)
Now, now, Alie. I have read your last post and this one.
Are you sure you aren't a writer? You have that writer feel to your words.
Depression happens to the best of us. Maybe taking a shower would help, and possibly something to eat.
What goes around does, indeed, come back around. Don't be all high and mighty towards those people who wronged you. Show them compassion.
Are you really mayo?
Alie, you may believe what you wish to believe. All I am going to say on the matter is, yes, I am Mayo.
On your posts, I like them. They are very original. You have a care free attitude and post what you want to.
Watch out, it may come back to bite you in the ass.
Mayonaise, if it's really you, then why aren't you signed in?
Hey fake mayonaise, how about you shut up? Your comments might not be mean but you shouldn't be pretending to be someone else.
alie #6 ewwwwwwwww!!!
oh for the days of uni! It was unfortunately a long time ago but I had a ball.
I lived off campus though so I missed a lot of dorm stuff, though I heard about it enough.
Had a similar experience to #6, but outside which was not realized until we got quite close, then we all burst out laughing!!
Oh I said on andreas blog too but you may not have seen I live at the equivalent southern latitiude to Cancun so similar climate, beautiful tropical Queensland in Oz.
If you like Cancun you'd love it here lol (did I say biased?)
If you haven't seen my message yet, check your myspace.
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